Can This Blended Family
Survive?
With one of every two new American marriages ending
up in divorce, and 75% of divorcees getting re-married,
there just might be a new face for the “normal” family:
the blended family.
But while it is quickly becoming the norm, stepfamilies
and extended families must often go through a period
of adjustment and conflict before they can function
as a unit. Meet two families trying to assimilate
and make it work: the Bruce-Pullens and the Lemons.
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Tyree Bruce and her four boys are caught in the
crossfire between her current husband Cary and
her ex-husband
Ron Pullen, who fathered the children. For two
years, the venomous relationship between the father
figures
has affected the way the children view their stepfather
Cary. Cary claims Ron is trying to turn the children
against him, while Ron says that Cary’s anger
problem is endangering the kids.
Larry and Dr. Jenn Berman sat down with the Bruce-Pullens
and Ron’s family to help them talk out their
issues. Dr. Berman suggested that this is an instance
of “triangulation,” in which the tension
between two people becomes so great that they draw
in a third party, in this case their children.
Larry encouraged the two fathers and Tyree to step
up,
set their differences aside and put the best interests
of the children first.
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In the case of the Lemons, promises really do
last forever. Debra Lemon and her sister Brenda
made
a promise as young children that if anything
unexpected ever happened to either of them, the
other would
care for her kids. When Brenda tragically died
of
a rare neurological disease later in life, Debra
and her husband Lamont became the guardians of
her 13 children and a grandchild, bringing their
brood
to an unbelievable 24.
Now the entire family is
living under one roof in a cramped 4-bedroom
house in the
Chicago suburbs, but the Lemons are making lemonade
out of life’s lemons, so to speak. Debra
and Lamont have taken all of their obstacles
in stride
and relish their new parenting opportunity, harmoniously
splitting up the chores and child care.
The local community has helped out with generous
donations, but there is still a need for a more
ample living space. Habitat for Humanity has
committed to building the Lemons a new house
with Project
Lemon-Aid – the
goal is to raise at least $190,000 to build a
7-bedroom, 4-bath home for the Lemons.
Watch this clip of the Lemon kids surprising Debra
in the studio, plus a special surprise for the whole
family!
If you would like to make a donation to help build
the Lemons a home, please send a check or money order
made out to Project Lemon-Aid to the following address:
Project Lemon-Aid
PO Box 1332
Chicago Heights, IL 60412
Quick Clicks
Check out today’s Advice Archive feature:
Visit the Lemon Family’s website @:
http://22lemons.acrodata.com
For more information on Habitat for Humanity,
visit:
www.habitat.org
Special thanks to the following vendors who
generously provided the Lemon family with
their products:
Walgreens (www.walgreens.com)
Dominicks (www.dominicks.com)
Sprint (www.sprint.com)
Hewlett-Packard (www.hp.com)
Olympus (www.olympusamerica.com)
JVC (www.jvc.com)
Mattel (www.mattel.com)
Whirlpool (www.whirlpool.com)
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