Angie, 42, Married, 5 kids
Harasses daughter for being overweight

Angie rides her daughter about her weight, calling her disparaging names because she’s at her wit’s end with Shelby’s weight-loss struggle. She says that Shelby is lazy and abuses food. She wants to see Shelby lose weight so she’ll come out of her shell and start dating.

HOW DO YOU HARASS SHELBY ABOUT HER WEIGHT?
I call her “Fatty”, “Chunky” and “Chubby.” I’m at my wit’s end because I’m so frustrated. I’ll do anything to motivate her. None of my girls are skinny, and I am not skinny. She gets discouraged so easily when she goes to buy clothes because she can never find anything in her size. I tell her, “You’re 14 years old. You’re getting to be of dating age. You’ve got to watch what you’re eating and how much you eat of it!” She overindulges. She starts eating something and just keeps going and going and going. Finally, it gets to the point where I’ll hide the food or tell her it’s gone. When I get frustrated, I say, “Eat it up, Chubs or Tubs!” She’ll say, “Thanks Mom, you’re saying I’m fat too.” I tell she has to lose the weight herself because I can’t help her. I try and convince her that if she loses weight, her life will be better.

DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF OVERWEIGHT?
Yes, I’ve always been a little chunky. Cheyenne says I’m chubby and it looks like I’ve had 30 kids. My dad calls me Fluffy because I’ve always been a little chunky. I could stand to lose 30 pounds myself.

WHAT HAS SHE TRIED TO DO TO LOSE WEIGHT?
She’s tried a couple diets. She’s tried watching what she eats. And then she thinks she’s starving to death if I tell her she’s getting a bowl of cereal for breakfast. She’ll say, “Mommy, I’m still so hungry.” During the summer, she was trying to ride her bike and she gave that up too. Right now, during PE, they have to run a mile for a grade. She got caught hiding behind the bleachers. She’s not trying. She says her chest hurts or her leg hurts. It infuriates me that she didn’t run. Why doesn’t she want to exercise? I tell she’s not trying. She’s got to eat right and exercise. I foresee a lot better for her than what she’s foreseeing. I know big girls need love too.

WHAT DOES SHE DO AT HOME?
She’s either on the computer or watching TV. This year, she’s had some friends she’s finally spent the night with. She’s coming out of her shell a little bit. For a while, she wouldn’t talk to anybody on the phone. I’ll tell her to go clean her room. I say, “Come on Tubs, get with it!” Yet, she waits by the clock for Cheyenne to come home and acts like a little mother.

WHAT’S SHELBY’S PERSONALITY LIKE?
When it comes to brains, she got them. She’s very smart. And she’s withdrawn and reads books and gets on computer. Shelby is more of a homebody. She worries about what kids will say about her when she goes to school.

WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR SHELBY?
She weighs 220 pounds at 5’5”. I’d like to see her get down to 160 pounds. I want her to improve her appearance and take good care of herself where people will respect for who she is. I want her to be someone people look up. I want people to say, “She did it. I can too.” I want her to have more friends and be able to go out. I want her to have a good close friend, someone she can go out and have a good time with. I’d like to see her get a nice boyfriend and be able to go to dances and social events. I think her weight is keeping her from doing that.

WHERE DO YOU GO OUT TO EAT?
Shelby’s favorite is Ryan’s or Ponderosa. She likes smorgasbord buffet things. She’ll have a big salad, meat and a bowl of ice cream. She goes overboard at home. One night, she came home from school and ate a PB&J sandwich, then an hour later made ramen noodles. It is just too much.

DO YOU HARASS YOUR OTHER DAUGHTER CHEYENNE ABOUT HER WEIGHT?
No because she isn’t it the fatty category. She’s chunky, but not overly overweight. She could teach Shelby a thing or two. She could lose 20 pounds and be in good shape. She just eats a lot of bread. She does buy a candy bar here and there. Or she eats Mexican food. She eats well. She porked up for a while, but she lost it all by running around. And now she goes to the gym. She was going to be on the swim team.

WHAT HAPPENS WHEN CHEYENNE CALLS SHELBY NAMES?
They are never satisfied unless they have the last word. Cheyenne will sometimes go off in fluent Spanish. I thank God I don’t know. Shelby is very protective of Cheyenne. Sometimes, I’ll smile if Cheyenne calls her “fat ass.” Sometimes, I do tell Cheyenne to stop. She’ll say, “I don’t care; she’s just a fat ass.”